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Day 43: Gift of love

Our home 2000-2007

“What is wrong with you Marica?” asks the voice in my head. “It is only a house.”

“This is no ordinary house,” I retaliated. “It has been our home for nearly seven years and a lot has happened here in that time. This house holds many happy memories for us.”

“But the time has come to move on and create a new home, only this time it will be your place,” continued the voice. “You will be happy there too.”

“I know. I know,” I responded.

As I talk to myself I have an overwhelming sense of sadness at leaving our current home while at the same time being so excited about our move because this is a dream come true for me. I have to ask myself why I am continuing to struggle with the idea of moving on.

“This is not just a house. It has so much more significance than that for us,” I continued.

Moving into this house, and being able to live here all this time, has been a loving and generous gift from two very special friends – Cathy and Colin. This same house is where they brought up their own family. This house had also been Colin’s family home where he had lived with his parents and sister. Our new home had all the hallmarks of having been a family home; you could feel it as soon as you entered it. It was imbued with the loving presence of those that had lived there before us. This house had been lived in. It already had many, many stories to tell before we ever set foot in it.

Setting up home here was a brand new beginning for my children and me. It felt like we had joined the land of the living again after some pretty traumatic years of hardship. Life had been tough – unbelievably tough. Our world had been devastated by a series of events that you wouldn’t believe if I told you about them; you would say I made it all up, but I didn’t. We lived through it all and we were badly scared and shell-shocked as a result. We had lost everything bar what we stood up in and some furniture but we still had each other and that was precious.

On 29 June 2000 we spent our first night in this house and it didn’t take long for us to turn it into our home. This was the beginning of the happiest years of my life so far and was a real turning point for all us.

As we prepare to leave many things have changed. We even have a new addition to our family – my husband Lynsey. In fact Lynsey and I had our first date in this house merely a few months after we moved into it.

We are all different people to the ones that moved in all those years ago. We are so much stronger. Living here has been a time of healing and growth for each of us individually and for us as a family unit. We are renewed. Our family is a loving and solid team which incorporates five very different individuals.

The time has come for us to leave. It is almost as though the house has been telling us this for a while like a parent gently nudging on a child reluctant to go out and explore the big wide world.

I feel more ready to do this now.

Thank you Cathy and Colin. There are no words to express what your gift of love to us has meant. It is deep, deep within and will never be forgotten. You are two incredible people that I feel privileged to know and have as friends.

My heart is exploding with gratitude and love
New beginnings create new possibilities
Light and life continue bright and full

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